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[征文作品] 【色城2010文心雕龙】【危情90分钟】(23号)

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评委:梦中双蝶

评分;9。0分

评语:先说缺点,本文语句不够精练,看着有些乱,因为语句的愿因,使文中的节奏有点顿。前面写的铺垫有点繁,使人阅读的兴趣不大。

      不过,后面越写越精彩,特别是娇妻许洁被两个淫棍淫的过程,隐晦而又淫秽,把人妻被人淫时的神态、情欲变化、心理纠结变成半羞半就的过程描写的淋漓尽致,让人在心酸的同时,血脉贲张。人妻的嫩、纯、成熟的性心理和易动情起欲的性生理描写的到位极了。

      这篇和6兄的《圈套》题材和手法差不多,但,与《圈套》。相比,此文的情节有点简单,文章的起伏不够,与《圈套》的一环套一环,一浪接一浪的高潮略差一筹,这也是比《圈套》分少的原因。
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  • fireice 金币 +30 有效! 2011-1-11 13:18

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